I have something to confess- I have never written a blog before.
I know what a blog is so I resorted to Google. It says
“a regularly updated website or web page, typically one run by an individual or small group, that is written in an informal or conversational style.”
Ok thanks- that tells me Nothing.
I guess that makes me a blog virgin as I am at the moment a comedy virgin- so the two virgins types can sit together and eat chips. There’s probably a joke there but I have comedy constipation at this precise moment.
I am an ex nurse ex police officer who turned to acting after I got injured on duty in the police and I retired because of my health, or lack of it. In June this year I did a stand-up comedy course at the London School of Comedy in Camden. They’re a lovely bunch and they do brilliant things in the community to tackle knife crime and help mentor young people whose start has not been the best. What’s not to like? Plus I had already booked and paid for a slot at the Edinburgh Festival to do a show that I hadn’t actually written yet.
I’d never done any sort of stand-up comedy and I had never been to Edinburgh.
What could possibly go wrong?
Here comes another confession (fellow lapsed Catholics will see a familiar pattern here). Whenever I had seen a stand up show the sight of the empty stage with a microphone was like a very strong magnet and I have to sit on my hands.
I always wanted to run up and say something (I never actually did it) – I realise this is weird and probably has a long name and involves visits to a psychiatrist.
So the course was really helpful and I wrote the show, did a preview of it, plus a couple of open mics then went to Edinburgh.
When I told my Dad he said no-one will come, then after a minute the word “unfortunately” so a nice bit of compassion there to lighten the kiss of doom, thanks Dad.
My Mum said I’m just worried you’ll die either on stage or actually just die.
Great thanks Mum.
I can confirm I didnt do either. The audience did laugh and hopefully not out of pity. A few people came up afterwards to tell me they loved the show. I’ve done a few spots in other people’s shows since and the Out of the Blue show is at Tribeca Basement in Manchester, for the Women in Comedy Festival on October 24th at 7pm. You have been warned. Oh and theres a bar and theres lots of other funny women doing their stuff too.
Theres been some fab gigs and of course not so fab- including one where there was no light! I am not even joking it was like being in a dungeon. A woman tried to sell me a bottle of knocked off champagne in the toilets when I said No thanks I was alright, she said I can get you any pills you want! I thought one guy was heckling me, so I went nearer to hear what he was saying and he was on his phone! Another instance, a bloke heckled me through a window while he was smoking a cigarette comedy gold! The audience were all rolling drunk and another woman tried to take the MCs mic- shouting that she wanted to make a stand against political correctness.
After that I tried to find that woman with the pills but she’d gone (I’m joking).
Thanks for reading guys if you’re in Manchester on 24th October I would love to see you at my show.